In her case the indifference was the best case. Only indifferent when her world, imaginary or otherwise, turned on its axis. I wasn't part of it. When I (or anyone else for that matter) somehow upset that rotation of her world, there'd be hell to pay.

I hadn't thought about it, but you're right. Neither indifference on a "good" day nor my getting in the way of her world on a bad one constituted hatred, just affirmed my non-existence. Not even worth hating; that's dark shit. You've actually laid bare a reason for my continued anger, and I'm actually grateful to you.

I did raise a son, and in his minority he never knew a day when one or the other of us wasn't home for him. I imagine I've effed up enough and given him enough mental damage so some therapist gets a ski-boat out of the deal, but he knew a home worth going to. He also knew his grandmother for what she was, but from a safe vantage point.

And so it is I do not tolerate the self righteous, the self-absorbed, and the confident fool. I now understand why indifference pisses me off to the same degree as liars, narcissists, cruelty, willful ignorance, people who call their flaws "diseases" or "conditions". It's all dishonesty and denial in the face of personal failings. I admit I'm a piece of work! Cynical, intolerant, and insular. A bit anti-social, too, it turns out. GRIN!

Have to say it's why I love my wife as I do. She has her flaws as we all do, but owns them. She stood quiet, reasonable, resolute, and strong against her mother in law yet it never got in the way of doing the right and honourable thing to help that woman when she needed it in her decline, regardless of whether she deserved it or not. The definition of true Christian charity, so rare amongst today's "Christians".

Probably why I get along better with cats than with people. Cats are unfailingly honest.