WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—In a bombshell report issued Monday, the Department of Justice said it has identified a man in a decades-old photograph of Jeffrey Epstein as former President Joe Biden.
The emergence of the Epstein-Biden photo has compelled the DOJ to open “a thorough investigation” into the ties between the two men, a Justice spokesperson said.
At the White House, Donald J. Trump said that the Epstein photo proved “Joe Biden’s crimes are even worse than Hunter’s.”
Asked whether he was confident in the accuracy of the DOJ’s identification of Biden, Trump said, “Come on—Pam Bondi’s on the case.
Trump is thinking about taking over DC. He has impulses, not thoughts. Thoughts require brains. Most trump impulses become blunders because they're not thoughts. They aren't thought out at all. Thoughts imply intelligence. Again trump loses.
Imagine what it must be like to have the mind of a willful juvenile delinquent in the decrepit body of a dirty old man. If God graced him, it was with the stupidity not to know.
He should be institutionalized. MAGA and the GOP require deprogramming.You can look away from a painting, but you can't listen away from a symphony
This is what he is doing and will do to our country, and he won't be able to blame it on anyone else but himself. He will be our downfall if allowed to continue on his path of insanity. When he is finished, we are the ones who won't have any "cards" to play with.
dt is a flipping IDIOT!!! and WOW, Major respect for Mark Carney!
Posted by Sia on July 9, 2025, 1:59 am, in reply to "He won't be able...." ADMIN
No one wants to deal with a liar, thief, bully....
tariffs and blatant violations of ethics and morality.
That he's last this long only goes to prove that so many in this country are extremely gullible and ignore reality in favor of their favorite bluster.
Inciting hatred and distrust between Americans WORKS all too well. He and the GOP have tapped into the hateful underbelly of America and it is poisoning ALL of us. Otherwise decent folks are cheering the destruction of others they disagree with and it's become endemic, not merely an aberration.
We can all readily see it in the GOP and its voter base, but do we also see it happening within ourselves now too? Posters here, whom I believe are good folks, are doing EXACTLY the same thing in broadbrushing the opposition as if they are a monolith and all either stupid or dipping their toes into genuine evil. That simply isn't so, but dt has infected this country with a profound distrust and dislike for one another that is now bordering on hatred for our fellow Americans who merely disagree with us on political matters.
THAT IS A TERRIBLE PROBLEM. Is it going to take a national disaster to turn that tide? Something on the level of 9/11? If 9/11 happened TODAY, would Americans respond as we did in 2001 by coming together as one unit, regardless of the "politics" and liberal vs conservative divide that we "enjoy" today?
My fear is that a new 9/11 today would result in dt and his MAGAts cheering that the "libs" got what they deserved instead of national outrage and bonding over a common enemy.
After 9-11, Falwell blamed the feminists, abortionists and the gays, and Bush exclaimed that "Islam is a religion of peace" before marching us off to war against a 'common' enemy.
In many ways, people want to have it both ways... It's their fault, but not their fault, or it's more their fault, or less their fault... Cake and eat it too.
There is no just or 'holy' war. Just a lot of dead bodies and apparently very few lessons learned...
I keep wanting to hold onto hope, but it continues to look more and more hopeless. I really don't know what it would take for a wake-up call. It may be too late, as you say. It was too late for the Germans by the time they realized what was happening. Not even all the kids who've been mutilated with assault rifles...and all those kids and people who drowned in a known "flash flood alley" because it was "too expensive" to have a proper alert system... all they get is "thoughts and prayers"... It's not enough to wake people up. People are blind due to all the hate and lies and passing the blame. And the greed. It's not even dt's fault entirely. He just tapped into the darker side of human nature in order to "win" and elevate himself... with no thought or care for all the irreparable damage done.
Agreed. That is exactly what he's done. He knows it though and doesn't care
Posted by Sia on July 9, 2025, 7:04 pm, in reply to "I hear you." ADMIN
Mike the Headless Chicken proves the felon cannot be guillotined
If the felon's head was severed from his body, he could continue to function and produce executive orders with barely any interruption or notice. As long as Leavitt and Bondi were available to force chunks of cheeseburger down his esophagus, he could remain POTUS well into the foreseeable future. You can look away from a painting, but you can't listen away from a symphony