I’m sorry for your loss - please accept my deepest condolences.
As a newly-wed you took on the honoured roll of wife. You were one of a couple, but now you don’t have the status of wife. Suddenly, it’s now difficult to figure out who you are: you’re now a widow, not married, not single and not divorced. Some words really matter in describing who you are, and ‘Widow’ - a very old word - is quite similar in connotation to relict or dowager (old woman, someone’s property), and not really how you feel inside, as the power of suggestion tries to dictate.
Some folk that become octogenarians, don’t feel that age, and, although they’re quite happy with life, would rather do without that name or classification.
I think the name ‘octogenarian’ is quite similar to ‘widow’, in that it pigeonholes people, by assigning them to a restrictive category ‘old’ that they’d rather not have. Alas, some people are widowed in their teens.
Brit, widower, Fauja Singh (now 108), completed the London Marathon aged 93, and at age 102, he completed the Hong Kong Marathon, and I’m sure the word widower doesn’t conjure up in our minds someone aged 102 running a marathon.
Jean, your husband will always be part of you.
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