323BC Alexander the Great died.
1675 Construction of St Paul’s Cathedral began.
1676 First Trooping of the Colour was held.
1677 Victoria accedes to the throne.
1678 The Automobile Association is formed.
1679 Gatwick airport was opened.
1680 The first bikinis went on show in Paris.
1681 Nelson Mandela was sentenced to life Imprisonment.
1965 The Beatles were awarded the CBE.
The manager of a large office noticed a new man one day and told him to come into his office. “What’s your name?” he asked the new bloke. “John.” was the reply. The manager scowled, “Look...I don’t know what kind of namby-pamby place you worked before, but I don’t call anyone by their first names. It breeds familiarity and that leads to a breakdown in authority. I refer to my employees by their last name only... Smith, Jones, Baker... that’s all. I am to be referred to only as Mr. Robertson. Now we have got that straight, what is your last name?” The new guy sighed and said, “My name is John Darling.” The manger quickly said, “Okay, John, the next thing I want to tell you is.......”
Actual call centre conversations....
RAC Motoring Services
Caller (enquiring about legal requirements while travelling in Europe) “If I buy a car in France, and then bring it to England, do I have to change the steering wheel to the other side of the car?”
Caller: “Could you give me the number for the knitwear company in Woven?”
Operator: “Woven? Are you sure?”
Caller: “Yes. That’s what it says on the label - Woven in Scotland.”
Geordie hates his wife’s cat so much he drives to the next town and dumps it. When he gets home, it’s there waiting for him. Next day he drives 50 miles and dumps it. When he gets home, it’s there waiting for him. So the next day he drives to the other side of the country and dumps it. Two hours later he phones his wife and asks, “Is the cat at home?” She says, “Aye, why?” Geordie says, “Put the cat on the phone, ah’m lost!”
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