George Watt --- and --- A Happy New Year to everyone.
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Two Lovely Black Eyes - by Bill Macdonald
Street musicians and singers were a source of entertainment during the years of the Great Depression. They made almost daily appearances in the street, but why they wasted their talents in such a poor locality as The Felling must remain a mystery. Some of them were quite good entertainers and I am told of one couple who used to sing a parody of a Music Hall song very popular at the time, and very appropriate for Felling in particular. It went like this …
Two lovely black eyes,
Oh! What a surprise.
Only for selling,
Scotch hares in The Felling,
Two lovely black eyes.
This referred to an episode which, temporarily at least, brought Felling its only claim to fame, although the local inhabitants would have been very pleased to remain in obscurity. The episode itself which was the subject of the song had apparently happened before I was able to understand it, but I often heard the story from my parents.
It appears that one of the more enterprising local ladies decided that what the people of Felling needed was a little variety in their menu and proceeded to cash-in on the popularity of Scotch hares a delicacy which she was able to supply at very favorable prices. I am told that these became a very popular addition to the menu and were in fact, voted a great success at the regular pie suppers held at the local pub.
Unfortunately, coincident with the sudden influx of Scotch hares, numerous inhabitants began to complain about the equally sudden disappearance of their cats, and if the culprit had considered the benefits of cremation as opposed to burial she might have continued to build up a thriving business. The enterprise came to a sudden end when the skins of the missing pets were dug up by dogs scavenging in a garden allotment. Consequently, the locals, and the police began to realize that two and two added up to four. The culprit was arrested and in due course the magistrates decided that for a period of at least six months, Scotch hares would not appear on the menus of Felling's pubs.
For many years the people of Felling were not allowed to forget the affair as passengers on the Sunderland and South Shields trains would lean out of the windows as the train stopped at Felling Station and keep up a continuous cat-call of 'Meow', to the embarrassment of the local railway porters. No doubt many ladies mourned the loss of their pets, but it just goes to prove the truth of the saying (with a slight variation) “You can't both have your cat and eat it."
Bill Macdonald
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