Airplane II: The Sequel-I swear there's a warning now before the Starz version that says the movie contains culturally outdated racial stereotypes. Get a life, people. Anyway, this is really funny, but almost exactly the same movie as the first, so it probably doesn't have to exist. The main difference is there's no Leslie Nielsen, and it's got William Shatner instead (that's a downgrade). There are also wayyyy too many puns. Punniest movie ever, I daresay.
The Silence-pretty much a ripoff of A Quiet Place, except they were made at the same time, so maybe not. It centers on a deaf chick and her family (Stanley Tucci plays the father for some reason) trying to escape from these bat-like predators that are hella blind, but don't make any noise, or they'll kill you. The bats themselves look cool, and there's lots of closeups that will make you laugh at their evilness, but there's also a sideplot where there's a cult (after like a week?) trying to steal the girl, because "the girl is fertile," so, yeah, it stinks.
Sisters-early De Palma about a former Siamese twin who's now into murder due to all the separation anxiety. When the funny-accented Margot Kidder is onscreen it's very watchable, but not so much when it centers on the investigation into the murder, which takes up like half of the film's running time. It's also extremely Hitchcock-like in parts, and it's even got a neat Bernard Hermann score.
End of Watch-Gyllenhaal and Pena as LA cops, with the former documenting everything with his camera, so be prepared for shakiness. They've got a good camaraderie going until they piss off the cartel. Decent movie with a cheat of an ending.
Up in the Air-Clooney flies around the country firing people professionally, and then has to take Anna Kendrick along with him when she comes up with a plan to fire people online instead. He's really happy until he unconvincingly develops feelings for a woman, and I think the lesson to be learned here is to go your own way. Nominated for best picture, somehow.
From Paris with Love-John Travolta and that boring Rhys Meyers guy as an extremely skilled killing machine retired special agent brought back into the fold and a newbie who's in over his head, as there's a giant drug bust and also terrorists, but I didn't care enough to figure out the connection there. The gun-stuff is fun, but also sometimes in slow motion (?). There's a cute Pulp Fiction reference too.
Turistas-torture-porn about some pretty people vacationing in Brazil who wind up getting some of their organs removed. Your mileage may vary.
Bullet Head-weird dog movie where Brody, Malkovich and one of the Culkins have just committed a robbery and wind up at a warehouse where dog-fighting happens regularly, sanctioned by a murderous Antonio Banderas. They each tell a dog story in between getting chased by a mean dog.
Ava-really bad actioner with Jessica Chastain as an assassin (trained by Malkovich) who keeps killing people and asking what they did wrong beforehand. She fights Colin Farrell at the end, so maybe just fast forward to that part if that sounds intriguing to you.
Alexander-Colin Farrell again in this loonggggg Oliver Stone epic that's got this boring Anthony Hopkins narration flowing through the whole thing, along with boring battle scenes (one's got elephants, at least) and Angelina Jolie (playing Farrell's mom, which is a bit weird) doing a bizarre accent that I'm not able to place. Also featuring Val Kilmer with one eye and Rosario Dawson's spectacular rack. There's more focus on Colin and Jared Leto's love affair than on, you know, the things that made Alexander great.
The Host-decent creature feature from the Parasite/Snowpiercer/Memories of Murder director, where this sea beast keeps coming ashore to grab citizens and bring them back to his lair for eventual eating. The sea beast attacks are pretty rad, but this is one of those movies where they should've just made the plot as predictable as possible, because sometimes you just want a happy ending where all of the underachieving characters prove themselves in the end and save the day.
The Bank Job-stylish bank caper based on a true story (kinda) with Jason Statham and Saffron Burrows in London in the '70s, but whereas he thinks they're only in it for the money, she's secretly retrieving lots of blackmail evidence on pervy governmental higher-ups. It's fine, and has a Mick Jagger cameo that you might miss.
Chain Reaction-Keanu is a machinist and Weisz a physicist working on a project that involves converting hydrogen from water to clean energy, but then there's Morgan Freeman who's the head of the project, but secretly a bad guy (sometimes), and soon enough the good guys are framed for murder (via a huge explosion) and on the run, while also contending with Freeman's team. From the director of The Fugitive, and you can tell.
Hangman-low-level serial killer fluff with Pacino doing a weird accent, and Karl Urban as the main detective, but they also bring Brittany Snow along as a journalist and almost get her killed repeatedly. Not so good, Al.
Lake Placid-there's a giant crocodile in the lake, and it's up to Bill Pullman, Bridget Fonda, sheriff Brendan Gleeson and an annoying Oliver Platt to stop it from killing people (but Fonda and Platt really just wanna study it). This is kinda charming and better than Anaconda, and also features a pretty funny Betty White role.
Swimfan-swimmer dude bangs the strung-out daughter from Traffic (in the pool, no less), but then she turns into an extremely resourceful stalker who can seemingly do anything (including killing cops while in custody). This is another Fatal Attraction ripoff that feels very Scream/Halloween H20/I Know What You Did Last Summer, but is generally okay despite its ridiculousness.
Brain Dead-not that one! This one's got both Bills (Pullman and Paxton) as neurosurgeons in a convoluted plot where the former keeps losing his identity while manipulating the brain of a former colleague who went crazy (or did he?). The second half of the movie has you trying to figure out if what's happening is really happening, but you can probably figure it out if you've got a working brain. Also, this is one of those movies where I remember seeing the VHS cover a million times growing up.