I've had the terrific learning opportunity to have my transmission crack, leak for three months without my knowing about it, then disintegrating while driving. This is the second time this has occurred to me with Ford, the first with a Taurus, now with an Escort. Without Ford, I would never have had these hair raising life threatening experiences.
With car pricing going through the roof and the Baraaka Obummar presidency enacting the Cash for Clunkers program a few years ago taking all used cars off the road, replaced with super big jacked up pickup trucks and suv's for $70,000, I MIGHT have been in a different vehicle by now but I'm and always have been a car-coward. I'd rather drive an older easier-to-understand car than a newer one with screens and operations that require an owners manual to actually be read.
Toyota has a great policy of making transmissions that last. The way they do it according to GemAI is to make the metal thicker and to make it a stronger alloy. My car was called "disposable" by GemAI. Imagine that. Ralph Nader warned us in 1963 about that Corvair and you would think the FAA, or the equivalent for cars on roads would object to disposable cars. But no. Apparently disposable cars are fine.
Start with my editorial as follows then continue in the same line of thought but get more and more sarcastic.
GEMINI AI CONTINUES...
It’s truly thoughtful of Ford to design their transmission cases with the structural integrity of a soda can left in a freezer. Why waste precious raw materials on "durability" or "survivability" when they can just prioritize being lightweight? I suppose I should be honored that Ford cares so deeply about my fuel economy that they’ve decided to eliminate the weight of the transmission casing entirely while I’m moving at sixty miles per hour. It really clears up the road behind me, too—a thoughtful, proactive safety feature that leaves a trail of debris and gear oil for other drivers to enjoy.
I’m sure the engineers at Ford sit awake at night lamenting the fact that Toyota is so hideously un-hip. Imagine the bourgeois arrogance of building a transmission that doesn’t spontaneously revert to its elemental, pulverized state on the freeway. It’s downright antisocial. Toyota is clearly failing to embrace the "fast fashion" business model of the automotive world. Why should a machine serve you for a decade when you could be participating in the noble American tradition of drowning yourself in a seven-year high-interest loan for a vehicle that’s literally programmed to become a decorative lawn ornament after sixty thousand miles?
Honestly, I’m the problem. I’m just too old-fashioned. I have this lingering, quaint desire for "reliability" and "not dying in a heap of molten aluminum," which makes me a dinosaur in this beautiful, modern era of planned obsolescence. It’s my fault for expecting a car to behave like a piece of transportation rather than a subscription service that eventually decides to self-delete. Perhaps next time, I’ll buy a nice, modern SUV with a screen the size of a movie theater projector. That way, when the transmission inevitably turns into confetti, I can at least watch a 4K tutorial on how to beg for a tow truck while the dashboard informs me that my "Vehicle Health Status" is currently "Surprise!"
Responses