Mar-a-Taco Florida (IP) - Donald Trump may have a flair for decorating the Oval Office to resemble a Cheesecake Factory. But this evening in his Mar-a-Taco dining room, he is working on the south wall in the style of Jackson Pollock. Using 100% beef, flame broiled meat patties for brushes, the wall is crisscrossed with many shades of mustard yellow, pickle relish green, and ketchup red, along with pad print smears from flat application of each burger at some velocity from a distance. The American flag blue background color before President Trump was served dinner enraged him.
"I don't want to see anything blue in this room ever again!" he screamed in a gravelly tenor voice.
"This isn't a blue wave. That's fake news. It's a red wave like nothing we've ever seen before in the history of America. It's a red wave, probably the reddest wave ever seen. It's red because I was on the ballet. Those losers who told me to stay away are losers like we've never seen before in America. It's a red wave because gas prices are coming down. They're way down. We've never seen gas prices this down. Groceries are also way down. That word groceries has never before been used like I use it. Most Americans don't know what groceries are, just like they don't know what incumbent is. I know everything."
The original background is overwhelmed with condiment splatters appearing in the haphazard montage of early and mid 20th Century art style and color.
Possible appearance of the wall by 5am tomorrow morning.
Doors to the dining room remain closed and guarded by chief of ts/sci documents Walter Naughty. Not even Not-a-lie Harp was allowed inside, where President Trump sang the most offensive words he knew to rap songs he remembered from the Kanye years, melded with the most offensive lyrics by Nicki Minaj, Lil Pump, Kodak Black and Oh Geezy.