The Deuce: reminds me of a classic

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reminds me of a classic

Posted by Sammich

on September 28, 2026, 17:35:57, in reply to "tell him you are gonna bang his mom if he doesnt peel back"

What we've become is contrary to what we want
Take a bow

101

Message Thread | This response ↓

4YO soccer coaching, how do you nerf a player who's too good it's not fun for anyone else? - RVA September 28, 2026, 11:00:17

there's nothing you can do. Anything you try is simply bandaging around the fact that - londoner September 29, 2026, 08:24:54
- Have you seen 4 year olds play soccer? Level doesn't make sense. - Quiz September 29, 2026, 12:44:16
  - yes, I've seen 4 year olds that are pretty clearly better than others - londoner September 29, 2026, 13:28:43
  - I interpreted level as age. Maybe little Messi can play with 5 year olds?* - CoronaTheirAss September 29, 2026, 13:00:17
- also, what's the format? In England, U5s play 3 aside, which I imagine would make this problem much - londoner September 29, 2026, 08:27:53
5lb (ea) ankle weights* - timmer September 28, 2026, 17:29:35
tell him you are gonna bang his mom if he doesnt peel back - digs September 28, 2026, 17:18:48
- reminds me of a classic - Sammich September 28, 2026, 17:35:57
Cut the hamstring on the back of his leg right at the bottom. He’ll never play soccer again.* - Carl Spackler September 28, 2026, 14:55:59
- my advice was going to be talk to Spackler* - memyselfandillini September 29, 2026, 07:02:59
- Lulz.* - Warrin'_Illini September 28, 2026, 15:00:27
4YOs have no clue what is going on -- just rotate them around - Quiz September 28, 2026, 12:07:45
- Yup * - ATL September 28, 2026, 12:23:21
Make them the goalie.* - DT September 28, 2026, 11:57:18
- wonder if it's a young enough level where they don't use goalies* - Gene Parmesan September 28, 2026, 12:18:04
  - You are correct, despite a dad on the other team last week yelling at his son to stay in the net - RVA September 28, 2026, 14:16:10
    - When my daughter was playing 5U soccer or whenever they start, I remember a team having like 3 girls - Herman Blume September 29, 2026, 08:00:49
      - The only thing crazier than 5U soccer is 15U soccer* - CoronaTheirAss September 29, 2026, 08:04:01
    - when my kids first started, teams played without a keeper* - Potomac September 28, 2026, 16:43:59
  - Yeah, typically no goalies in 4u* - UofIL6 September 28, 2026, 12:19:55
- This is probably the best answer, but I'd discuss with parents first* - AintHatin September 28, 2026, 12:15:01
- Oh, now Johnnie Soccer gets to use his hands too?! This kid will never give up the rock now.* - Warrin'_Illini September 28, 2026, 12:02:35
Tell the kid after he scores a goal, he has to pass until somebody else scores a goal. #noshots - JFG September 28, 2026, 11:02:56
Make him/her use their less dominant foot, require x passes per possession, reward - UofIL6 September 28, 2026, 11:01:41
- Unfortunately he hasn't been too receptive to coaching - RVA September 28, 2026, 14:23:35
  - Just to be clear, I think it's very odd for kids in this age group to be doing anything remotely - ATL September 28, 2026, 14:30:42
    - No. 2 Son learned at a very young age (4) that if he just hung out near the goal - bbonb September 28, 2026, 14:44:22
      - This is the way * - ATL September 28, 2026, 17:34:16
    - I get that but it's been great to see my daughter and her friend on the team get better - RVA September 28, 2026, 14:40:59
      - i've noticed that most of the time, even the young kids try to keep score. (unfortunately a lot of - torinese September 29, 2026, 08:25:28
- Major risk here is that - ATL September 28, 2026, 12:38:30
- key is framing it as a reward/development/challenge vs punitiive* - torinese September 28, 2026, 11:17:45

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