The Deuce

The Deuce
[ The Deuce ]

Why is our national birthrate declining? There’s never been a better time for women to have babbies

Posted by bbonb User icon on September 29, 2026, 16:40:42

Dying during delivery has been all but eliminated

Mothers get Push Presents

Parents get Babymoons

Male partners get paternity leave so they can help out the baby momma for several weeks

And robot nannies are just around the corner

Turned my paternity leave into a full time thing

Posted by RVA User icon on September 30, 2026, 13:13:36, in reply to "Why is our national birthrate declining? There’s never been a better time for women to have babbies "

Our hands were kinda forced there but it turned out to be the greatest gift imaginable

I became a great uncle a couple of weeks ago.

Posted by EffinIllini User icon on September 30, 2026, 13:06:05, in reply to "Why is our national birthrate declining? There’s never been a better time for women to have babbies "

So there's one new kid. Mom's a Spartan fan so that sucks for him. At least Dad roots for the Illini.

Dad's going to take a portion of his 8(?) weeks of his paid paternity leave to overlap with deer season.
Mom's a teacher and I think she doesn't get paid for her maternity leave. weird.

Feel like I should be getting BIG BEERS after that post.

Previous Message

you were just OK before that?*

Posted by Sammich User icon on September 30, 2026, 13:14:28, in reply to "I became a great uncle a couple of weeks ago."

Previous Message

What we've become is contrary to what we want
Take a bow

Yes, per my sister.

Posted by EffinIllini User icon on September 30, 2026, 13:18:24, in reply to "you were just OK before that?*"

She proudly gifted me a shirt at Christmas that says "World's Okayest Brother".

Note: It wasn't one of her kids who had the baby. (progeny is from mrs. Effin's side of the family.)

Previous Message

Thanks for the update on your weenis.*

Posted by SurfTheBoneyard User icon on September 29, 2026, 18:25:40, in reply to "Why is our national birthrate declining? There’s never been a better time for women to have babbies "

Previous Message

Sky Marshal of the Luftwaffle

“Surf is just a national treasure.” — Jackie

Liberal women are no longer having children so white people can be replaced by illegal immigrants

Posted by biclops User icon on September 29, 2026, 17:46:06, in reply to "Why is our national birthrate declining? There’s never been a better time for women to have babbies "

That’s the goal. That’s the rule now.

Don't take offense, better make amends
Rip it all to shreds and let it go

What are we doing? What's going on?*

Posted by KingTalkyTiki User icon on September 29, 2026, 17:48:13, in reply to "Liberal women are no longer having children so white people can be replaced by illegal immigrants"

Previous Message

That’s the goal. That’s the rule now.

"You must own the honor of being the whitest, military vet, fat, multiple state property owner but most of all the one who hates their own country the most in our country."

ah. ah-ha. ah-ha-ha-ha*

Posted by biclops User icon on September 29, 2026, 18:03:55, in reply to "What are we doing? What's going on?*"

Previous Message

That’s the goal. That’s the rule now.

Don't take offense, better make amends
Rip it all to shreds and let it go

THE RENT IS TOO DAMN HIGH...*

Posted by haighter User icon on September 29, 2026, 17:43:34, in reply to "Why is our national birthrate declining? There’s never been a better time for women to have babbies "

Previous Message

I read an article recently in which they asked a bunch of women about this and most of them said

Posted by Herman Blume User icon on September 29, 2026, 17:32:35, in reply to "Why is our national birthrate declining? There’s never been a better time for women to have babbies "

it’s because you have a “weird dick.”

Previous Message

ERIC?*

Posted by assassin User icon on September 29, 2026, 17:36:23, in reply to "I read an article recently in which they asked a bunch of women about this and most of them said"

Previous Message

it’s because you have a “weird dick.”

Previous Message

Brandon Schrock of Laredo, Texas, told the federal government that his employer was “poop,” and his occupation was “pooper.”

People have forgotten how is babby formed.*

Posted by ATL User icon on September 29, 2026, 17:19:41, in reply to "Why is our national birthrate declining? There’s never been a better time for women to have babbies "

Previous Message

“We are old and tired and just want to be taken care of.” - Republican voter, Dec. 2024.

...but not how much one costs.*

Posted by KingTalkyTiki User icon on September 29, 2026, 17:23:16, in reply to "People have forgotten how is babby formed.*"

Previous Message

"You must own the honor of being the whitest, military vet, fat, multiple state property owner but most of all the one who hates their own country the most in our country."

We need SI to invent external wombs. Just baste your turkey and put it in the oven.

Posted by Warrin'_Illini $<iframe src='https://mb.boardhost.com/TheDeuce/info/user=Warrin\'_Illini' width='330' height='300' border=0 style='border:none;' tabindex=0>$ on September 29, 2026, 17:09:40, in reply to "Why is our national birthrate declining? There’s never been a better time for women to have babbies "

With advancements in technology, no doubt it'll take a lot less time than 9 months, too.

Previous Message

I said forget about it cuh

Maybe by the year 2525*

Posted by Stu User icon on September 29, 2026, 17:14:02, in reply to "We need SI to invent external wombs. Just baste your turkey and put it in the oven."

Previous Message

With advancements in technology, no doubt it'll take a lot less time than 9 months, too.

Previous Message

Chicken Little poster child

You’ll pick your baby from a long black tube

Posted by Stu User icon on September 29, 2026, 17:15:00, in reply to "Maybe by the year 2525*"

Whoa-oh-oh

Previous Message

With advancements in technology, no doubt it'll take a lot less time than 9 months, too.

Previous Message

Chicken Little poster child

I remember reading a scifi series that featured artificial (super?) wombs

Posted by Sammich User icon on September 29, 2026, 17:12:23, in reply to "We need SI to invent external wombs. Just baste your turkey and put it in the oven."

and it struck me that they could be a solution to the whole abortion debate, though I'm sure somebody somewhere would be friggin weird about it and we'd just be back to square one

What we've become is contrary to what we want
Take a bow

The kind, sweet young woman who lived above us in our condo..

Posted by KingTalkyTiki User icon on September 29, 2026, 17:04:42, in reply to "Why is our national birthrate declining? There’s never been a better time for women to have babbies "

...died ten days after giving birth from a rare blood clotting pregnancy complication that impacts 1 out of 10,000 pregnant women.

I'll be sure to let her widower husband know that dying from childbirth has all but been eliminated, right after he gets back from picking up the beautiful 2yo daughter that he's raising alone, from daycare.

"You must own the honor of being the whitest, military vet, fat, multiple state property owner but most of all the one who hates their own country the most in our country."

Some of you owe Taz an apology.*

Posted by Chuck Woodaby User icon on September 29, 2026, 17:07:37, in reply to "The kind, sweet young woman who lived above us in our condo.."

Previous Message

I know it's bbob.

Posted by KingTalkyTiki User icon on September 29, 2026, 17:10:59, in reply to "Some of you owe Taz an apology.*"

I don't find his schtick particularly funny, but it's normally harmless.

I just find it a bit crass here, so no regerts.

"You must own the honor of being the whitest, military vet, fat, multiple state property owner but most of all the one who hates their own country the most in our country."

Everyone send money to Samuel Alito's Mom's Satanic Abortion Clinic and we'll have e-hugged it out.*

Posted by complainant User icon on September 29, 2026, 17:23:40, in reply to "I know it's bbob."

Previous Message

I don't find his schtick particularly funny, but it's normally harmless.

I just find it a bit crass here, so no regerts.

This is the most privileged and obtuse statement I've read on here

Posted by Taz User icon on September 29, 2026, 16:57:05, in reply to "Why is our national birthrate declining? There’s never been a better time for women to have babbies "

And that's saying something.

Previous Message

Sometimes you just need to yeet a bobcat *

Being an Illini fan is a goddamn curse.*

time to take the rest of the day off*

Posted by assassin User icon on September 29, 2026, 16:58:03, in reply to "This is the most privileged and obtuse statement I've read on here"

Previous Message

And that's saying something.

Previous Message

Brandon Schrock of Laredo, Texas, told the federal government that his employer was “poop,” and his occupation was “pooper.”

Jesus Christ, taz*

Posted by Sammich User icon on September 29, 2026, 16:57:41, in reply to "This is the most privileged and obtuse statement I've read on here"

Previous Message

And that's saying something.

Previous Message

What we've become is contrary to what we want
Take a bow

Y'all been bonbonbbed and tazzed*

Posted by Taz User icon on September 29, 2026, 17:35:42, in reply to "Jesus Christ, taz*"

Previous Message

And that's saying something.

Previous Message

Sometimes you just need to yeet a bobcat *

Being an Illini fan is a goddamn curse.*

nice try*

Posted by assassin User icon on September 29, 2026, 17:43:08, in reply to "Y'all been bonbonbbed and tazzed*"

Previous Message

And that's saying something.

Previous Message

Brandon Schrock of Laredo, Texas, told the federal government that his employer was “poop,” and his occupation was “pooper.”

Lol.*

Posted by Taz User icon on September 29, 2026, 17:53:36, in reply to "nice try* "

Previous Message

And that's saying something.

Previous Message

Sometimes you just need to yeet a bobcat *

Being an Illini fan is a goddamn curse.*

Broads, eh?*

Posted by complainant User icon on September 29, 2026, 17:18:42, in reply to "Jesus Christ, taz*"

Previous Message

And that's saying something.

Previous Message

« Index

298

[ The Deuce ]