The Deuce: It’s in the conservative “comedian” starter kit. *

The Deuce
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It’s in the conservative “comedian” starter kit. *

Posted by VIV

on August 2, 2026, 11:23:34, in reply to "Why do all these guys sound like this? *"

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American Citizen charged with destruction of evidence for giving border patrol a fake password that wiped his phone.

Border patrol doesn't know whether there was any evidence and they didn't have a warrant.

https://boingboing.net/2026/07/25/grapheneos-duress-password-border-search.html

"the alchemy of the tartar sauce and cheese with the fish combined with the buttery steamed bun is so good." - Sounder re: a Filet O Fish

22

Message Thread | This response ↓

Political shit for the week of July 27th and August or whatever. * - doubledown July 27, 2026, 7:57:47

this thread isn't too long - can we just change the title and make it cover this week too* - Orangeillini Yesterday, 12:51:09
- The lengths of the political threads has shortened a lot. It could go back to monthly.* - Stu Yesterday, 12:54:55
Trump shoots a two-under "70," wins Club Championship at Trump National, again. - complainant August 2, 2026, 22:46:13
- He’s never won at a club he doesn’t own. Go look up his scores the one time he played in Tahoe - Mrap24 Yesterday, 12:21:20
  - so 20 years ago he was a bogey golfer. which isn't horrible for an everyday person that's 60... - shua Yesterday, 12:27:29
    - Correct but even at 60 he was telling people he was shooting 69-75 - Mrap24 Yesterday, 12:39:32
      - I'm trying to understand Trump's level of narcissism - Sounder Yesterday, 12:43:23
        
        He believe everyone else cheats just as much as he does, so his cheating doesn't really affect - doubledown Yesterday, 13:03:45
        
        I think that is probably true - Sounder Yesterday, 13:05:16
        
        It's probably just muscle memory at this point. His brain is 2-week old pea soup.* - Warrin'_Illini Yesterday, 12:57:03
  - The funnier part of that story is that is also when he met and banged Stormy Daniels* - Sounder Yesterday, 12:24:19
- I legit wonder how good of a golfer he actually is - Sounder Yesterday, 12:01:01
  - he's quite good for the general public. there's also no way an 80 year old is winning - John Coctostan Yesterday, 12:17:04
    - Here's the thing - Sounder Yesterday, 12:25:54
  - he seemed to golf pretty well with brycen on one of those 59 videos.* - Ari Gold Yesterday, 12:11:55
    - There's this - Sounder Yesterday, 12:12:43
  - My bet is he’s never been better than mid 80s. * - doubledown Yesterday, 12:05:20
- Kim Jong Un type shit* - VIV Yesterday, 10:21:07
- It's like Judge Smails - UofIL6 Yesterday, 10:09:25
  - someone needs to yell at him "Hey Whitey, where's your hat?!"* - DanSaint Yesterday, 10:17:44
- How bad must he be that cheating can only get him a 70* - KCWildcat Yesterday, 07:56:41
  - I was thinking 59 sounded about right. - complainant Yesterday, 07:59:09
- Apparently, the way he rationalizes this shit is pretty nuts. - doubledown Yesterday, 07:55:14
- Funny how he only "competes" at his clubs.* - SurfTheBoneyard August 2, 2026, 22:52:50
  - ooo - Mrap24 Yesterday, 07:54:30
Trump likes BBC. - SurfTheBoneyard August 2, 2026, 20:14:38
- ooo - ATL Yesterday, 05:38:54
So this OH thing with Max Miller and Bernie Moreno blew up today. - SurfTheBoneyard August 2, 2026, 11:29:14
- Downright presidential* - RVA August 2, 2026, 18:11:25
- Also bizarre timing. 8/5 deadline to replace Miller on the ballot. - Carl Spackler August 2, 2026, 12:54:17
- Very weird that this only came to a head on moreno’s part now. His daughter has allegedly been being - ATL August 2, 2026, 12:14:53
  - The rumor is that Moreno has a gay online profile - Sounder August 2, 2026, 12:38:28
    - That would track for a republican elected official * - ATL August 2, 2026, 12:51:29
Steven Crowder: “Fascism is pretty cool, you guys.” - VIV August 2, 2026, 10:02:10
- “That’s just a fact” is a very popular conservative follow on to a statement that is made up. * - doubledown August 2, 2026, 21:40:38
- *That smug feeling of knowing you were right the entire time** - KingTalkyTiki August 2, 2026, 10:51:33
  - "So a few communists took a helicopter ride...okay!" - KingTalkyTiki Yesterday, 11:57:14
- We are the frog in the boiling water* - Sounder August 2, 2026, 10:51:24
- In 2018 he was all like “don’t call me a fascist. I’m not a fascist!” Always takes conservatives a - ATL August 2, 2026, 10:30:14
- Why do all these guys sound like this? * - haighter August 2, 2026, 10:28:47
  - It’s in the conservative “comedian” starter kit. * - VIV August 2, 2026, 11:23:34
- LMFCO - Jackie August 2, 2026, 10:05:24
Trump’s bank accounts were closed due to money laundering - ATL August 1, 2026, 17:40:14
- and only when he came back into power did he sue the banks for it - memyselfandillini August 2, 2026, 11:41:46
- Todd Blanche trying to figure out how to omit the box labeled "definitely don't look in this box" - ghost_of_clt August 2, 2026, 11:31:25
ooo - ATL August 1, 2026, 6:43:05
Have we talked about the 60,000 Moroccans that swam to Spain this week? - TarheelIllini August 1, 2026, 6:42:59
- It’s a lot harder to get to mainland Spain from Ceuta than it is to get to Ceuta from Morocco.* - ATL August 1, 2026, 6:45:34
  - dots - complainant August 1, 2026, 6:53:18
    - It’s unfortunate how our education system is absolute shit when it comes to world geography * - ATL August 1, 2026, 7:28:13
Kayaker case dropped by the Feds. I swear if you are a lawyer with DOJ at this point - ATL July 31, 2026, 17:38:50
- The Art of the Friday News Dump* - illini222 July 31, 2026, 22:09:54
- Didn’t realize it was TACO Tuesday * - PapaDels July 31, 2026, 17:46:23
  - box o' wine Friday* - assassin July 31, 2026, 17:56:44
- Admitting “flawed installation.” - SurfTheBoneyard July 31, 2026, 17:39:42
Let's see....Friday afternoon, markets closed...this seems about right - UofIL6 July 31, 2026, 16:37:23
Is "rescue" the right word here? - doubledown July 30, 2026, 17:48:38
- Who is giving a 24-year old with FTX on his resume billions of dollars?* - ATL July 31, 2026, 8:32:20
  - People with more dollars than sense. * - doubledown July 31, 2026, 8:35:36
Social media just reminded me that today is the 6 year anniversary of - doubledown July 30, 2026, 17:41:51
IBM CEO says that in 3-4 years ‘unbreakable’ crypto codes will be broken - Stu July 30, 2026, 17:24:00
- Is this a quantum computing thing? Because lol no* - gvibes July 31, 2026, 20:24:50
- He is from UofI and a really nice person ;)* - Quiz July 30, 2026, 21:27:38
- He's jealous of Anthropic and OpenAI threatening to destroy the world with AI. - doubledown July 30, 2026, 17:33:32
- We can only hope. * - assassin July 30, 2026, 17:26:28
Want to learn how to cook that dead possum you found by the side of the road? - Stu July 30, 2026, 13:45:21
- I'd take cooking advice from Jimothy the Raccoon before that jagoff. - KingTalkyTiki July 30, 2026, 13:49:21
  - Leave Jimothy out of this* - Sounder July 30, 2026, 14:59:02
    - I heard that Jimothy is pro-Israel. * - doubledown July 30, 2026, 14:59:45
      - Jimothy and Ikea Monkey were in the closet making babies and I saw one of the babies - Sammich July 30, 2026, 16:55:43
      - I heard Jimothy is having an affair with Taylor Swift* - Stu July 30, 2026, 16:16:59
      - I heard Jimothy used AI to record a pro-Israel reggae song - Tortillini July 30, 2026, 15:22:08
        
        This would be really bad for his music career if. * - doubledown July 31, 2026, 8:36:18
        
        "You say genocide, I say war" is the worst call-and-response prompt I've ever heard of* - Sammich July 30, 2026, 16:53:15
        
        ILL-INI kind of sucks, too - DT July 30, 2026, 18:02:15
      - AIPAC's reach is as long as Jimothy's spine is short* - Sammich July 30, 2026, 15:06:17
        
        Jimothy also secretly tipped off ICE about half of Ballard's undocumented nannies. * - doubledown July 30, 2026, 15:09:11
        
        Did the other half buy his silence?* - DocWalk20 July 30, 2026, 15:37:38
  - He probably thinks cooking pork to 145 degrees causes autism.* - DT July 30, 2026, 14:23:31
  - I'll take that as a "No thank you."* - Stu July 30, 2026, 13:54:16
Chuck's favorite Kremlinologist is the top trend on Twitter. - complainant July 30, 2026, 1:12:48
- If you're going to post slop from Ben Shapiro's lackey at least use the preferred nomenclature. - Chuck Woodaby July 30, 2026, 12:18:01
*i can’t believe we’re losing to these guys meme* - ATL July 29, 2026, 21:42:01
- Maybe because your mom can afford a second home in NYC, nerd* - TarheelIllini July 30, 2026, 12:09:18
  - How many homes do you own?* - ISeeDeadHawkeyes July 30, 2026, 12:39:01
- Even looking at the free part of the article I'm confused, is mom a resident of NYC or not?!* - KingTalkyTiki July 30, 2026, 11:09:50
  - I just hope he is able to file the form to fix this in the next 3 weeks in between writing articles - Chuck Woodaby July 30, 2026, 12:24:32
- it's because most elected Democrats are on the author's side* - Sammich July 29, 2026, 21:45:54
"I'm Ross Douthat. All that, and more, tonight on 60 Minutes."* - complainant July 29, 2026, 17:40:28
- Douthat has described his views and conversion to Catholicism as being influenced by the writings of - Stu July 29, 2026, 17:46:45
30 year yield highest since 2007, market plummeting at the close.* - Stu July 29, 2026, 14:51:48
- So much winning* - timmer July 29, 2026, 16:00:30
  - Rick Santelli says the market is showing how much it loves Trump - Stu July 29, 2026, 16:15:49
    - well, hard to manipulate the markets without that love* - torinese July 30, 2026, 10:00:14
DOWn 1000* - Stu July 29, 2026, 14:36:08
Fed votes 9-3 to keep interest rates steady * - assassin July 29, 2026, 13:09:30
- Guess Trump doesn’t have it rigged enough yet.* - SurfTheBoneyard July 29, 2026, 17:03:26
- Warsh is about as unimpressive a speaker as I've ever seen* - Stu July 29, 2026, 14:30:38
Rand Paul is a feckless cunt. * - doubledown July 29, 2026, 12:32:51
- Agreed. The man has zero feck.* - KingTalkyTiki July 29, 2026, 13:02:51
  - unfeckable.. never do feck * - memyselfandillini July 29, 2026, 13:21:11
    - Feck-free, if you will. * - Tuscy July 29, 2026, 14:12:42
      - Feck around and find out* - bbonb July 29, 2026, 15:28:55
        
        Feck the police* - ATL July 29, 2026, 21:08:55
In a clear sign that the economy is working for the people, Apple has introduced a leasing plan - ATL July 29, 2026, 11:56:21
- As usual, the lease Apple can do.* - memyselfandillini July 29, 2026, 13:22:28
- I’m not leasing a phone like it’s the fucking sixties. * - doubledown July 29, 2026, 12:32:01
  - Landline phones didn't really depreciate - jfinsocal July 29, 2026, 16:26:12
  - Common misperception. The 60s were pretty chaste. - complainant July 29, 2026, 13:54:06
  - put it on layaway like it's the 80's!* - shua July 29, 2026, 12:45:57
Heh....it looks like they're turning Dulles into Hartsfield-Jackson. - ATL July 29, 2026, 10:31:39
- End of the mobile lounge?!?* - KingTalkyTiki July 29, 2026, 10:37:31
  - A sad day for Freedom Loving Americans Everywhere.* - ATL July 29, 2026, 10:48:03
    - I'd love to buy one of those and drive it around as a mobile party lounge!* - KingTalkyTiki July 29, 2026, 11:45:46
      - Buy a few and turn them into an aviation themed restaurant * - ATL July 29, 2026, 11:57:19
hey what's the worst that could happen? - ijustkrushalot July 29, 2026, 9:27:57
- THAAD was my favorite character on Blue Mountain State* - Sammich July 29, 2026, 9:35:58
  - Pride of Hoooopston.* - ATL July 29, 2026, 10:31:59
Trump has obviously been reading this board - Stu July 29, 2026, 9:18:46
- He wants to launch a nuke so bad. * - doubledown July 29, 2026, 9:21:51
  - he's an expert at bombing - VIV July 29, 2026, 10:03:15
    - I heard it was bad, then I saw footage. - KingTalkyTiki July 29, 2026, 10:26:59
      - Never a good sign when you need to keep asking, rhetorically, who wrote this bad material* - UofIL6 July 29, 2026, 10:40:46
  - I don't think he wants to do anything except talk tough and be cheered* - Sammich July 29, 2026, 9:34:01
    - Pretty much been his M.O. for decades.* - DocWalk20 July 29, 2026, 14:55:27
- i thought we were ceasing operations?* - VIV July 29, 2026, 9:20:26
  - What happens when you assassinate the leader of a religious state? - Stu July 29, 2026, 9:22:20
    - were they not aware that we already won this war a bunch of times?* - VIV July 29, 2026, 9:40:40
Things seem be going great in the Senate - Sounder July 29, 2026, 9:05:43
- What have you been up to, Fauci??* - Warrin'_Illini July 29, 2026, 9:25:17
  - What's it all about, Fauciiiiii? - Stu July 29, 2026, 9:29:41
I'm experiencing a sudden appreciation for both TikTok and AI. - complainant July 28, 2026, 22:39:11
Abdul El-Sayed - complainant July 28, 2026, 20:27:56
- Best leader Syria's ever had* - Stu July 29, 2026, 5:13:58
- better choice - Nobster July 28, 2026, 21:52:21
- Would* - HeatMizer July 28, 2026, 21:44:48
Iran just launched a surprise attack on centcom - Stu July 28, 2026, 18:01:58
- CFH in Doha?* - timmer July 28, 2026, 18:11:35
FIFA reported to be considering selling out to Jared Kushner’s brother - ATL July 28, 2026, 17:34:19
Ukraine hits Iranian ships carrying military aid to Russia - ATL July 28, 2026, 15:46:23
55% of Independents and 23% of Trump voters want Bibi arrested - ATL July 28, 2026, 13:09:54
- For what it's worth, I don't think he should be arrested. * - doubledown July 28, 2026, 13:26:35
- 49% total. Rookie numbers.* - Warrin'_Illini July 28, 2026, 13:18:35
AJC: United approached Delta for a merger - ATL July 27, 2026, 16:48:53
- that United thinks the DOJ would approve this is scary.* - cpsteine July 28, 2026, 16:31:10
- Competition is so 20h century. Joining superteams is what stars do now* - Sammich July 27, 2026, 17:20:46
Trump with a mastery of the Spanish language - Sounder July 27, 2026, 15:17:36
Trump says he will ask Putin if Russia has been providing targeting data to Iran - Stu July 27, 2026, 14:12:19
- Putin: - ijustkrushalot July 28, 2026, 13:21:09
  - Putin: Sure, we're helping Iran target and kill American soldiers. By the way... - Stu July 28, 2026, 16:29:51
- Sun Tzu has nothing on the Artful Dealer.* - complainant July 27, 2026, 15:46:13
Where is doubledown? Market up huge, Spacex down. LOL* - Stu July 27, 2026, 8:40:02
- It's a volatile stock, so I typically wait until later in the day. It's overvalued at any price. * - doubledown July 27, 2026, 9:46:44
- Didn't realize Musk can't sell anything until June 2027* - Carl Spackler July 27, 2026, 8:53:52
  - I assume he's already taken out loans against his locked up shares. * - doubledown July 27, 2026, 9:47:33
- I should have sold on Day 1. Now, I'll just hold on to that garbage forever.* - Warrin'_Illini July 27, 2026, 8:42:32
  - Hard to sell when everyone is frothing at the mouth over something - Stu July 27, 2026, 8:45:29
    - Disappointed in you, Stu. * - Tuscy July 27, 2026, 9:28:40
    - I can't wait to catch his AI-generated "historically accurate" Odessey.* - Warrin'_Illini July 27, 2026, 8:52:25
Monday morning pullback on war efforts sending oil lower and futures higher* - UofIL6 July 27, 2026, 8:15:49
- It’s really amazing how easy it is to manipulate the market.* - Mrap24 July 27, 2026, 9:39:24
- To quote Admiral James Stockdale: - Stu July 27, 2026, 8:18:10

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