Here's an article that I found interesting.


"When President Donald Trump greeted the Prince and Princess of Wales on Wednesday, he immediately commented on Kate Middleton’s looks.

“You’re beautiful, so beautiful,” he told the royal.

It wasn’t an isolated moment. Trump has a long history of leading with remarks about how others look. After meeting with Prince William in Paris last year, he told the New York Post, “He’s a good-looking guy. He looked really, very handsome last night. Some people look better in person? He looked great. He looked really nice, and I told him that.”

The president frequently comments on the attractiveness of people he encounters ― from military servicemen to judges to foreign aides ― often using the term “central casting.” He has even repeatedly described a murdered Ukrainian refugee in terms of her beauty, and his social media posts following the death of Charlie Kirk described the slain activist’s widow as “beautiful.”

On the flip side, Trump is also quick to lob appearance-based insults, particularly toward women. Just a few of the many examples include calling Jessica Chastain “not hot,” Stormy Daniels “horseface,” Rosie O’Donnell “fat” and “a pig,” and Bette Midler “extremely unattractive.”

Although the president isn’t the only person with this compulsion to constantly comment on people’s looks, seeing this fixation from someone at the highest level of government raises bigger questions: What does the tendency to focus on appearance say about someone’s values, worldview and character? And how does this kind of rhetoric, especially from public figures, affect people as individuals and our culture at large?

What This Habit Says About Someone

“Many people comment on others’ appearances as a reflection of their own insecurities or societal conditioning,” said Monica Cwynar, a licensed clinical social worker with Thriveworks. “This behavior often stems from a need to assert social dominance or align oneself with prevalent beauty standards. It often reveals a lack of self-awareness or acceptance and a reliance on external validation.”

She emphasized that these kinds of comments can highlight deeper self-esteem issues and a desperate need for approval.

“Our culture is shaped heavily by white supremacy, capitalism and patriarchy, which trains us to evaluate and rank people visually before anything else,” said mental health therapist Panicha McGuire. “Beauty standards rooted in whiteness, thinness, youth and able-bodiedness are held up as the ‘ideal,’ so people internalize the compulsion to comment on appearance as a way of sorting who is ‘valuable’ and who is not.”

So while the impulse might seem casual or even harmless, this habit tends to reflect bigger cultural forces and personal anxieties ― making appearance-focused remarks less about the person being observed and more about the speaker’s internalized values and struggles.

“Sometimes it’s an awkward attempt at connection, but often it reveals insecurity, bias or a worldview where worth is tied to conformity with those dominant standards rather than to substance or someone’s character,” McGuire said.

How Trump’s Fixation On Looks Affects Society And Culture At Large

“When public figures focus on appearance, they reinforce superficial values within society,” Cwynar said. “When it comes from our leaders, the impact has more gravitas, especially when it is delivered from men about women and their appearance. This behavior can perpetuate harmful stereotypes, create a culture that prioritizes looks over abilities or character and normalize objectification.”

She believes this phenomenon is evident in the decreased self-esteem among teens today, which she linked to the high value placed on looks on social media and TV.

“It sends a message that self-worth is contingent upon appearance, influencing how individuals perceive themselves and others,” Cwynar said. “The broader cultural implications include increased anxiety, body image issues and a relentless pursuit of unrealistic beauty standards.”

There’s an even more sinister impact to this kind of rhetoric from world leaders as well.

“When leaders do this, it reinforces a culture of dehumanization,” McGuire said. “It tells us that the most important thing about a person is whether they fit a narrow ideal of beauty or masculinity. It also distracts from accountability, policy and real issues by keeping the conversation shallow.”

By centering specific values, this kind of leadership sends a message that those who deviate from those norms should be reduced, ridiculed or erased.

“It erodes empathy when we reduce people down to their appearance,” said licensed therapist Joshua Terhune. “To make matters worse, it also influences younger generations to do the same thing. I’ve even seen montages on social media of Trump insulting others’ and people think it’s funny. It’s dehumanizing.

And in the case of the Trump administration, the focus on appearance seems to have led to placing highly unqualified and even potentially dangerous people in powerful governmental roles.

How This Habit Affects Us As Individuals

“Focusing on appearances significantly impacts how we view others and ourselves, fostering a superficial understanding of relationships and leading to bias,” Cwynar said. “All of this is having a monumental impact on our mental health. Looking oneself in the mirror can be hard enough; then looking at oneself through an unrealistic prism doesn’t help as we need to make space for everyone.”

She emphasized focusing on achieved, rather than ascribed characteristics in people and noted how identity factors like gender, race, socioeconomic status play into the way appearance is perceived and criticized.

“Individuals, especially women, are often judged more heavily based on looks, which can lead to heightened anxiety or self-consciousness and depression,” Cwynar said. “Similarly, societal attitudes toward masculinity can pressure men to conform to specific ideals of attractiveness, causing distress and isolation.”

McGuire similarly highlighted the harms of focusing on looks and thus collapsing people into objects to be judged.

“Appearance-based comments carry particular weight,” she said. “Women are often valued or dismissed based on attractiveness, Black folks are policed for their hair and bodies, Asian women are exoticized, and people of size, disabled people, and neurodivergent people are stigmatized.”

This phenomenon doesn’t just affect social interactions but can touch bigger systems, McGuire added. She pointed to the issue of implicit bias in health care.

“For example, patients who don’t fit white, thin, able-bodied ideals are more likely to be dismissed, misdiagnosed or not taken seriously by medical professionals,” McGuire said. “So what seems like a casual comment about appearance can reinforce biases that shape whose pain is believed, whose body is seen as ‘worthy,’ and who receives adequate care.”

How To Break The Cycle Of Leading With Looks

Many people display this harmful tendency to constantly comment on others’ looks ― often without even realizing it. The good news is there are things you can do to put a stop to it.

“The first step is to slow down and notice where the impulse comes from,” McGuire said. “Ask yourself, am I reinforcing a majority standard, or am I genuinely affirming someone in a way that honors their humanity? Instead of defaulting to appearance, naming qualities that reflect who someone is such as their humor, creativity, kindness, or insight.”

She emphasized that compliments about looks are not inherently bad and can be part of conversation, but the problem is when they dominate all of our interactions.

“By shifting our focus, we can practice affirming people for their whole selves rather than how closely they conform to dominant ideals,” McGuire noted.

Awareness is indeed the first step in mindfulness. When thoughts about appearance arise, Cwynar recommended taking a beat to recognize and reflect. Then make efforts to shift your language and highlight other traits.

“Seek out communities or individuals who prioritize deeper connections and serve as positive role models,” she said. “Promote open discussions about the impact of appearance comments, encouraging loved ones to speak up against superficial judgments.”

She also encouraged self-compassion with positive affirmations to counteract societal pressures around appearance. The goal is to foster healthy self-image and connections based on character and kindness rather than just looks.

For Terhune, the question of whether or not to comment on someone’s appearance lies in the “30 Second Test.”

“If they cannot easily change right their appearance in 30 seconds or less, don’t comment on it,” he explained. “If someone has gained weight or looks tired, they probably know and they can’t do anything to immediately fix that. They don’t need your comments. But if they have lipstick on their teeth or their shoe is untied, that information may be helpful to them and they can quickly change that in 30 seconds.”

As for others in your life who make lots of comments on appearance, Terhune recommended giving them the benefit of the doubt and simply ignoring their statements, then redirecting the conversation back to less superficial topics.

“But if they insist on commenting on appearances, you can set boundaries like ‘I’m trying to focus less on appearances. It’s better for my mental health,’” he said. “Or if you’re feeling snarky and confrontational you can say ‘Gosh, Janet, you really mention people’s weight a lot. Want to say what’s really going on with you?’”